Monday, July 29, 2019

PART THREE --- THIS IS MY LIFE


PART THREE---THIS IS MY LIFE

It was a playhouse that could only come from the imagination of a preschooler who had no knowledge of television, telephones, or electricity. It was a kid playing in the white sands shaded by the sweet gum trees. A make-belief farm with plenty of land, a nice house, and tooth pick fence posts connected with white cotton string.  Many animals carved from sweet gum balls and pine cones.  A hand-made toy truck, complete with wooden wheels, that was used for transportation to the make-belief market. Money grew on trees. A farm that consisted of well cultivated rows of blades of green grass, that represented stalks of corn. It was a well designed farm complete with a farm pond and pieces of a broken mirror used to symbolize water, with hand-carved ducks swimming all in a row. I lived the life of a Louisiana farm boy who had little knowledge of the outside world. Even though I lived in a not so fancy house, it was a home filled with unconditional love.  

I was enchanted by the new world that opened when I was bused off to school. I wasn’t so sure about this thing called education; but I was sure I wanted more. Soon I was high school graduate, with a college degree, and a Southern gay man, who realized at an early age that struggles would not be easy. I was taught that my sexual orientation was an abomination to God, and that hell was my destiny.  I had no other choice, at the time, but to believe my fate.

After several years of teaching high school English, I settled on a job teaching Civics in a Magnet School in Little Rock, Arkansas. This job provided many opportunities, but the main objective was to satisfy my interest in politics. To make the job more interesting I had the unique experience to be a teacher in a school where Bill and Hillary Clinton were parents. I learned to appreciate both of them as dedicated parents with interests that expanded into all aspects of public education.

The decision to continue teaching until I qualified for retirement was one of the best decisions I ever made. When you’ve been a poor man most of your life, and you finally have enough money to pursue your dreams; life takes on a complete different meaning. I was never satisfied with my life in the closet, yet I feared being fired. Nevertheless, I learned to fill the days with so much work that I had little time to think about sexual desires.

Moving outside the USA gave me a second chance on life. I have always had an interest in the people of the world, and I had doubts concerning the way social problems were approached in the USA. I made the decision late in life to visit other countries, and to be more than just a tourist. It was important to get to know the people, see how they lived, and if possible how they think.  What really happened in the process, I became endeared to Eastern culture, and it made a dramatic change in my way of thinking. The policy of acceptance is woven deep into the Buddhists religion and this was helpful in formulating a favorable opinion of me and others like me.       

Since I started on this journey and began expressing my opinions in a writer’s blog, I have been accused of many things. One thing is for certain, I do not hate America. I have learned that there are limited opportunities for individuals in other countries, and that knowledge has given me a greater appreciation of America. There is no doubt that I am where I am today, because I was born in the land of opportunity.

I always had opinions concerning elected officials, but none greater than Donald Trump. I do not believe that evil deeds can be ignored by religion, especially Christianity. I believe that Christians should endorse honesty and defy liars. I believe that America democracy is experiencing a great test, and I hope when this test is over, that democracy will be declared the undisputed winner.  












1 comment:

  1. I read this part with great interest as I too have tried to understand why I have been able to have a life of better opportunity just because an egg and a sperm met in the USA instead of a country such as Thailand. They certainly have less opportunity but in many ways I feel some are much more deserving. In my private thoughts I question, where is this just God I was taught to believe in. I just don't see the justice.

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